Yesterday was Dad’s birthday, so the family went out for dinner at Pizza D.O.C. on Lawrence, near Western. We took the festivities to Carol’s Pub afterward for beers and karaoke. Laura had mentioned how fun Carol’s is on Thursday because of karaoke. I quickly put in my slip (and a tip for the karaoke dj) for a song and then another slip minutes later. I wanted to sing some country music! The people who sang were entertaining, a couple of people were good, but most people were just God-awful! The most memorable awful performance of the night was the overweight lesbian who wore a skin tight lime green top, black skirt, and red leather sandals with heart shape details. Her rendition of Me and My Bobby McGee was, literally, painful! “Big Tits,” as my father named her, was the worst karoake singer I have heard in my entire lifetime.
The dj called me up for my first song but he was playing the wrong song so I had to take my seat and wait for him to call me again. Many, many minutes later, the dj called me up to sing, and I rocked out Long Time Gone by the Dixie Chicks. It was soooooo much fun! Those hillbillies love their country music. People were hooting and hollaring, clapping, and stomping their feet.
Besides “Big Tits,” the white trash couple making out near the stage were grossing me out. They weren’t just kissing; they were going at it! At one point, she straddled him and they were grinding! Ugh, get a frickin’ room already!
We left soon after my song. I don’t think too many people in our group will be going back there anytime soon. I may go back next month for their karaoke contest. The winner gets a trip for two to Las Vegas. Seeing fat chicks with big boobs in too-tight shirts, and gross, grinding hillbillies may just be worth it for a free trip to Viva Las Vegas!!!
